Seriously, Dude...

Surprise, surprise.
Matthew McConaughey's new movie Surfer, Dude is going straight to DVDs.

The story's about a soul-searching surfer who is experiencing an existential crisis.

A dude who surfs?? What is this, his reality show??

Oh, What a Creepy World

It's winter season but somehow we found many shots of celebrities hanging around in their bikinis. Here's a shot of former supermodel Stephanie Seymour playing with her daughter Lilly on Flamands Beach in St. Barts, France.

The hot mama inspired us to have some fun so we BitchTalkers hit the beach early this day. But suddenly we saw something lurking in the water, with color so blinding it nearly poked us straight in the eyes. We saw a trout pout and guessed that it might be a fish of some kind but then we saw that it wore a bikini. A fish? In a bikini?

NOOO!!! IT'S DONATELLA VERSACE !!

We ran and ran, trying damn hard to get the hell away from the ugly creature, but when we finally got to the shore, we smelled something so stinky and saw dead fish washing up on the shore. We were so afraid to turn around to see what caused all this, but alas, we finally did.








GAAARHH!! IT'S AMY WINEHOUSE !!!

Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow (Thank GOD!)

Robert Pattinson is so into his character Edward Cullen so much that he thinks he's a vampire and doesn't have to wash his hair for four straight years because hey, vampires don't eat, so they may as well don't have to shower, do they? But realizing that fleas have started to build a kingdom in his hair, he finally decides to chop it all off.

The “Twilight” drunken face was spotted showing off his short cut at Heathrow International Airport in London, England earlier today (December 22).

It's been said that his hair was already sold to someone with an equally disgusting taste of hairstyle. He quickly asked for a hair transplant, and fleas all over the kingdom were finally happy again.




Pete Wentz

Rihanna Sported Waves that Would Make Surfers All Over the World Happy

Rihanna smiles for photographers at the 2008 UNICEF Snowflake Lighting at Grand Army Plaza in New York City on Wednesday.

And apparently someone out there thinks "actress" when he sees Rihanna.

With Gossip Girl creator Josh Schwartz about to create a younger version with its newest X-men installment, MTV thinks that Rihanna could follow Halle Berry and be the next Storm.

No doubt about it. With hair like that, she could be the next Tsunami.

The Video Has Arrived. Whoopee.

Rihanna's “Rehab” music video was just released!

The video, which features Justin Timberlake, was shot last month in Vasquez Rocks Park, outside of Los Angeles. (Timberlake and Timbaland wrote the song and also contributed backing vocals in the bridge.)

They wrote the song? Rehab's basically Timberlake's "What Goes Around", he just changes the lyrics. How creative.

click here for the music video.

SEPARATED AT BIRTH (Not in a Good Way)

Top: Hilary Duff's sister Haylie Duff; Bottom: Sarah Jessica Parker

Yuuuuuuck!

With events like this happening in front of our eyes for free, we're thinking freakshows all over the world will soon go bankrupt.



Transgender man Thomas Beatie, who was born a woman, is expecting his second child, Barbara Walters announced on The View Wednesday morning.

Who Needs Porn when There's Disney

Don't we all just love Disney's kids...

First, Vanessa Hudgens's nude photos surfaced on the Internet. Though we doubt anyone got turned on by her apple-sized boobies, the news was quite scandalicious.

Lately, some shirtless photos of Zac Efron is floating around and they are for sale. Fingers are pointing at Disney, alleging that they axed some scene of what was apparently a Zac Efron-led musical sequence in a boys’ group shower on “High School Musical 3″.

And NOW!

Cheetah Girls vocalist Adrienne Bailon has landed herself in a nude photo scandal. Several practically nude photos have been stolen from Adrienne's laptop, and the guy who took them is trying to shop them around to the highest bidder, according to TMZ.

Bailon was at JFK airport in late October when her laptop went missing. Later that day her record label received an anonymous phone call from a man saying he had her laptop and would return it for $1000.

The anonymous man was given the money, and in turn he returned Bailon's missing laptop ... except one minor thing was missing -- several semi-nude photos of Bailon.

The photos were taken as an anniversary present for her boyfriend Robert Kardashian - brother of Kim Kardashian.

The photos are now plastered all over the net. The Cheetah Girl has already put her attorney to work. Reps for the wannabe starlet have also issued a statement from Bailon in apology.

“I am deeply sorry for any pain this may have caused to her fans.”

Why should she be sorry? These Disney kids are innocent, we say, for they only learned these things from their ancestors. Daisy Duck never wears panties, right?

Not again!

Girl,...we know you ugly and all but just when we think you couldn't possibly get any uglier and trashier, you keep proving us wrong, time and time, and time, and time again, damn, good job Miley!!

Are You Ready?

For some Twilight awesomeness

Carefull
This creatures is coming at you on

November 21, 2008


Here is Robbert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart a.k.a Edward and Bella (on drugs) in all their glory!!











one word, actually make it two : Sexiness Overload!!

can't waiiiit!!!

Boring Couple Celebrates Halloween

Hilary Duff and hockey player boyfriend Mike Comrie dressed up as Brangelina for Halloween.

Oh relllehhh??!! Pitt and Jolie? More like Dave Cook and Mimi Hitam to us.

Recently, the 21-year-old singer/actress released her “Reach Out” music video. It’s the first single off Hilary’s compilation album titled Best of Hilary Duff, due out November 11.

We have no idea how a 5 year old has already produced a "Best of.." album. We haven't even name ONE song of hers, and even if we could, we wouldn't call it the best.

Play the "What Happened to Tara Reid" Game

What comes into your mind when seeing this picture? Here are our answers.
A. We're looking at a 90 year-old woman who stuffs her boobies with two papayas
B. Tara Reid has sucked out all fat - and everything else, apparently - in her stomach and ass, and uses them to fill up her boobies

Rescue Us From Her!

On Thursday, Mariah Carey and her boy toy, Nick Cannon, hosted a Halloween party at NYC club Marquee. Here she is, dressing up as a fireman.... or fire..chick. Or fire..whale. Ironic, since on this year's Halloween my friends told me to dress up as a monster and so I came up with a Mariah Carey mask.

Rest In Peace

Hollywood fashion critic, Mr. Blackwell has died.

The inventor of the famed "Worst Dressed List" passed away Sunday after suffering complications from an intestinal infection, according to his publicist, Harlan Boll.

His death comes more than two months after he collapsed at his Los Angeles home in August and fell into a coma. He regained consciousness a few days later and was put on antibiotics to treat an unspecified illness.

The star - real name Richard Sylvan Seltzer - began his career as an actor in the 1930s, But it was his Worst Dressed List that he became most noted for, and his scathing reviews have been published every year since its inception in 1960.

In his latter years, Blackwell suffered from ill health and was diagnosed with Bell's palsy in 2001.

Somewhere out there, Miley Cyrus and Katie Holmes are having a party.

We will miss you, Mr. Blackwell.

Sweetie VS Yucky

Dakota Fanning is a cheerleader for her LA-area school, Campbell Hall. Here she is at a game this past weekend.

We used to loathe her for being too mature beyond her years, but oh well, sometimes even we BitchTalkers have to admit that the girl looks really good these days. She should tap herself on the shoulder too, for going through puberty gracefully. Girlfriend got skills. Unlike that useless skank Miley Cyrus. She couldn't even behave well for a minute. Her she is, licking her lips as she cheers on model beau Justin Godknowswho walking the runway at Christian Audigier’s American Lord fashion show on Wednesday in Culver City, Calif. And judging by the picture, her mom is hollering "Cheers from the skanks!"

Yowzer!

Having a marvelous time abroad, Christina Aguilera was spotted out to dinner with her husband Jordan Bratman last night in London, England.

The “Ain’t No Other Man” starlet was looking frikkin curvy in a cleavage-baring beige-pink evening gown underneath a black wool topcoat while her hubby donned a classy black tuxedo... and a depressed face.

We get depressed to, Jordan, to see your supposedly beautiful wife start to become more like a tranny each day and that one day you look at your reflection and realizes that your ugly face has looked much better than hers. We're not sure what to say about her ever expanding boobies. Whether guys like it or not, we don't care. We only bring up the issue so that we have a reason to post THIS!


Not that you guys care who she is, but this is Elizabeth Hurley at the Global Illumination Initiative at the London Tower. Our guess is, Liz thinks that getting invited to Global Illumination Initiative means that she has to take the "initiative" to bring "globes" to "illuminate" some people in the world, especially guys, if you know what we mean. Of course you don't. We're even sure you are not reading this since your eyes are all glued to either one of the two pics we post above.

Mischa Barton Attends Stuff. Again.

Mischa Barton arrives at the launch party for Google’s new T-Mobile G1 cell phone held at Siren Studios on Friday in Hollywood.

The T-Mobile G1 with Google is the first commercially available phone to run on the ‘Android’ operating system, which empowers developers with tools to create and offer consumers applications that add value to their lives.

MOCKING TIME!

Notice that Mischa has always worn leggings or pantyhose ever since magazines all over the world posted pics showing cellulite on her thighs? So leggings have become some sort of cover-up, eh? So that's why Lindsay Ho-han often wears them nowadays? Nope, she's just plain crazy.

Mommy, Mommy, I Want Jolie

That face is... unreal.
Angelina Jolie appears on the Today show where she was interviewed by Matt Lauer at NBC Studios in New York City on Thursday.

We used to try hard not to roll our eyes everytime we heard about her adding up a little tuyul to her family (by getting pregnant, that is), but then we saw her face on TV and we totally forgave her. Again and again. We hate ourselves.

And she's the only one who can look and sound sexy when saying "mommy and daddy". This is very disturbing. Is this what the doctors call "mother complex"? If we suffer from it, will Angie feel sorry and adopt us too? *puppy eyes*



Pretty.

Preggers?? That THING??

Victoria Beckham wears a tight mod dress as she arrives at LAX to catch a flight to London on Sunday.

The 34-year-old former Spice Girl recently told the U.K. edition of Glamour that, “I’m not pregnant, and I’m not trying to get pregnant at the moment”
“I’m so lucky to have the boys (Brooklyn, 9; Romeo, 6; and Cruz, 3) and they’re such great kids. Nice, free spirits and incredibly polite, which I think is very important.”

“It takes a lot of energy, and the thought of having another baby now would be a little bit much. Maybe in a year or two but right now, I’m having amazing career opportunities and I want to enjoy the boys,” Victoria said.

What Victoria really tries to tell you is that the thought of gaining weight to have a baby scares the bejeezus out of her, and she would like to think that the already existing kids of hers already have everything she could possibly hope for, despite the obvious fact that some of them inherit their mommy's piggy nose. And who the FCUK (excuse our French) spreads rumors that she's pregnant?? Do you wanna kill her by making her think that her body looks FAT nowadays? You wanna see her go back to the eat-and-drink-nothing diet? If she loses another pound she'll be flown back to her homeplanet in a breeze.

We Would Change Our Minds, Too!

Angelina Jolie reveals in the new issue of W Magazine that she had only planned on adopting children but after falling in love with Brad Pitt, he changed her mind.

Here are some quotes from the mag via People:

On Brad changing her mind about giving birth to her own children: “I think one of the life changing things that he did, one of many, is that I was absolutely never going to get pregnant. I never felt that it was the right thing to do… I suppose I just looked at him and loved him and just felt open to (getting pregnant). I suddenly wanted to. It’s one of those things you can’t explain.”

On Brad seeing adopted children Maddox and Zahara: “I knew that he would never see them as different, and that gave me a certain peace.”

On having three children with Brad: “I wouldn’t trade that experience for the world. It taught me a lot about life, just the process of it, and now we have three other beautiful children that wouldn’t otherwise be here.”

On baring her body for the intimate W pics taken by Brad just weeks after the twins’ birth: “I’m with a man who’s evolved enough to look at my body and see it as more beautiful, because of the journey it has taken and what it has created. He genuinely sees it that way. So I genuinely feel even sexier.”

On Brad being perfect for her: “[I have] a lot of respect [for Brad. He helps me] to be better and fight hard for the things that I love. I do think that I’m in a good partnership now. I think it just needed to be the right man.”

Things would be really different if we, the always fabulous BitchTalkers were Brad Pitt's wives.

On Brad changing her mind about giving birth to her own children: "I used to hate tuyuls... I mean kids. But the thoughts that the children would inherit HIS genes were so promising that I had decided to produce babies once a year."

On Brad seeing adopted children Maddox and Zahara: "Well you can see that they DON'T share his genes, so I once tried to return the kids to the orphanages, but Brad convinced me to keep 'em. Said it was good for publicity and stuff. Anything to keep my babydaddy happy."

On having three children with Brad: "Not enough. Once a year, I said."

On baring her body for the intimate W pics taken by Brad just weeks after the twins’ birth: "Ga usah for the W pics. I'd bare my body anytime, anywhere, just so he can see that I'm always ready to do it with him. But I bared mine outside our home one day, and he got furious. Something about "being embarassed", I dunno.

On Brad being perfect for her: "Duh."

Whitney and "the City"

She’s making herself at home in her New York City surroundings, and yesterday Whitney Port was spotted out in Central Park with a gal pal.

Miss Port was reportedly filming scenes for her new reality show “The City”, set to air in early 2009, that documents her life in the Big Apple as she works for Diane Von Furstenberg’s fashion label.
Let's just hope that the fact that she's now working for some fancy fashion label and away from all the drama surrounding Lauren, Audrina and Heidi that Whitney will have much less boring conversations. Otherwise they would more or less sound like this.

Whitney (always the one who has no interesting activity to talk about): "So what did you do last night?"
Some chick: "I went to this new club..."
Whitney: "Really??"
Some chick: "... Err, yea. Really. This new club, with my friends. And..."
Whitney: "That sounds cool!"
Some chick: "What sounds cool?"
Whitney: "You know, hanging out with your friends and stuff..."
Some chick: "Oookay... Anywho, I wore my new dress, all of us danced, and had some drinks,.."
Whitney: *Gasped* "Oh my God! How did you feel?"
Some chick: "...... Fine ....... Where was I? Oh. So after a while I became sleepy and I thought I better go home."
Whitney: "I totally agree."

Heather Locklear's Mugshot Revealed

Here is Heather Locklear's mug shot!

The 47-year-old actress was arrested Saturday night in Santa Barbara for “driving erratically” upon leaving a parking lot.

According to The Associated Press, Heather was booked on suspicion of driving under the influence of prescription medication. She was later released without having to post bail.

Please note that BitchTalkers are not quite sure about the accuracy. Some say that this picture was taken on Heather's wedding day back in 1994, when she realized that she was about to marry Richie Sambora.

Oh, NOW She's a Diva.

Selena Gomez is unusually camera shy as she goes through airport security and then departs from LAX with her mother and stepfather on Saturday night.

The 16-year-old Wizards of Waverly Place listened to her iPod while she rushed through the airport and tried to avoid photographers as much as possible.

Yeees, she must be pretty shy (and embarassed, exactly) after hearing news of her lame movie Another Cinderella Story going straight to DVDs. Have you seen it? It's so effing lame we spent every second wishing the two main characters would die. No, we wish ALL of the characters would die! How sad, isn't it, that we're no longer fans of the only Hollywood chick we used to adore. But then again, we're not BitchTalkers if not bitchtalking!

Our Nightmare Has Come True

Our beloved bitchtalking fans, that's miss cempreng Rachel Bilson promoting the launch of her new collection ‘Edie Rose’ at the Macy’s in Aventura Mall on Sunday in Aventura, Florida.

“I want people to see these clothes for what they are, not just another line designed by another celebrity,” The 26-year-old Jumper star said. “I want the line to be taken seriously.”

Well dearest, just because you don't want your clothes to be just another line designed by another celebrity, doesn't mean yours have too look like a tribute to Charlie Chaplin.

Love Story of a Skank and a Hasbeen

Got this *cough* "important" news from perezhilton.com.
Donnie Wahlberg may not yet be a New Kid Divorcé On The Block - as he awaits the completion of his August divorce from wife of nine years Kim Fhey - but that hasn't stopped him from getting cozy with skankalicious girl band member Aubrey O'Day of manufactured Danity Kane fame.
In a steamy interview with Complex magazine, Aubrey discusses her penchant for porn, her pal Jenna Jameson, kinky sex, the type of men she digs, and denies getting close to Making the Band teacher and ring leader P. Diddy.

Aubrey told the mag, "I like dating guys who don’t take themselves too seriously,” she said. “Who can make me laugh. Who are very smart. There are so many gorgeous men that come into my life, but they’re just very stupid and I can’t do it.”

We have something in common here. We sure love guys who don't take themselves seriously. At least we love SEEING them not taking themselves seriously, u know, like joining this ancient boyband who still call themselves New KIDS on the Block, singing about meeting some crazy stupid chicks in summertime and asking for their phone numbers and stuff. Surely they make US laugh, so hard that we often fart several times and make some people around us faint for several minutes.

Gossip Girl Season 2: Yuck and Even More Yucks

So sad to see season 2 of Gossip Girl is becoming more like a soap opera. Just when we were finished going to the bathroom to puke after seeing Nate Archibald doing it with a 100 year-old chick, we had to see a picture of him making out with little (bitch) Jenny Humphrey!

Wanna know something interesting? We found this footage of Gossip Girl doing an interview at Paley Fest some time ago. If you just stop drooling over Ed Westwick and his sexy British accent in this vid, you will notice that the interviewer asks Chace about "Jenny and Nate". Chace responds with "Age difference, man, I dunno."

Gossip Girl at Paley

In the blink of an eye, Nathaniel suddenly has sex with a much older woman, AND now we know that he'll be doing something nasty with a much younger girl. DOUBLE YUCK! It's like having to hear Britney's song, and realizing that Heidi Montag is in it too, doing a duet. What...? IT'S ALREADY HAPPENED? *Jumping off a cliff*

More about the interview here. Click on it, it's really interesting. Our libido rises back after seeing pics of Chace and Ed. Together. Ahhh...

So Proud of You, Gisele

Gisele Bundchen has one leg up on her jeans as she shops at Boutique Ludivine in New York City’s West Village on Friday.












Watch and learn, girls. Gisele's the only chick who can pull off this weird look, so if you want to have fun with your jeans, learn from HER! Never, EVER, try to copy Katie Holmes's way of rolling up her hubby's jeans. It would only add more proof that your man is four feet tall.